If there were any piece of advice I would offer to anyone starting a new venture in life, it would be this: court failure.

Failure is a dirty word in our culture. It has a potent negative connotation that sends chills up many a spine, mostly the spines of people who don’t do much.

That’s not a criticism but an observation. You cannot succeed without failures and you can’t succeed without doing a lot of work. So if you’re doing a lot of work, you’re failing more than infrequently.

Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment.
-Mark Twain

How to Court Failure

Every day that you get up and work toward a goal in a new arena, you are courting failure. You’re inviting problems for which you don’t yet have solutions, attempting tasks for which you don’t yet have skills, and often planning a future that you don’t yet know how you’ll pay for. You’ll make mistakes in most every category.

I started a new business this year. I literally can’t count all the failures I’ve experienced in less than six months. But I’m still having fun so I hardly notice them.

That’s not entirely true. Sometimes they hurt and made me kick myself. But I am comforted by the thought that when this happens, it’s because I’m courting failure, a necessary action on the route to … to where exactly?

Another Dirty Word

I know you may be irritated with me for goin’ all Zen on ya, but it is a fact that we spend so much time trying to categorize the actions of our lives into successes and failures that we miss a lot of life as it passes by every day.

Success is not the opposite of failure; it’s merely the other end of the see-saw. When we persist in labeling success as failure’s opposite, our focus becomes skewed and we live with an anxiety that saps the creative energy required to move forward.

We don’t often stop to question where our definitions of success and failure come from. I’m not talking about the etymological origins but the sociological origins. Who imposes these ideas of success and failure upon us? No one, really. We willingly put them on like a hand-me-down coat and wear them like the king’s robes.

Living by Choice

While sitting on my front steps after a run this morning, I caught myself ruminating somewhat anxiously about the future of my business. As I looked up at the early-morning spring sun glowing through verdant, newly-leafed trees, I suddenly decided, “I am going to live this day.”

I wanted to simply experience the day in whatever form it arrived, watch how it interleaved itself with my life and my plans (or interrupted them), and just live. I wanted to acknowledge the uncertainty of tomorrow and the day after, knowing that it would be a sin to allow that uncertainty to mar today.

I was partly … “successful.” On and off through the day, I prodded myself to come back to this thought, to this living in the day. Sometimes it worked and sometimes the rush of traffic beside me or the question of a stranger pulled me back into the swirl of ruminating about the future. But in those moments, I was successfully courting failure as well.

The degree with which we can live without anxiety about what a particular moment or event in life means is the measure of how much we actually live. One way to reduce the anxiety about whether or not we’re successful is to be conscious of courting failure. When we truly see the value in failure, both success and failure assume equal weight, neither to be fully trusted nor feared nor expected to fill our every day. Neither is an end in itself.

Tomorrow, when you get up, try for just one day to court failure.

Lisa’s Comments: I absolutely love this article because it not only applies to our websites, but our day to day lives.  Your perspective and attitude make all the difference.

If you interview every successful Internet marketer, I bet they will have stories of failure.  I have plenty.  Without them, I wouldn’t be where I am today.  It’s not how many times you fail, but what you do with the lessons that blossom from those failures.

Brian V. Hunt spent more than a decade as a senior writer at Microsoft. He’s an SEO copywriter, performs search engine optimization, is a senior copywriter, and writes sell sheets for clients at B2B corporations and commercial web sites. Get more tips from him on writing for the web and SEO at http://brianvhunt.com.

Some people just start out with the right attitude.

When it comes to making money online, they don’t complain about how difficult the journey is.  They just go for it.

They are resourceful people who take the information you give them and run with it.

They have this adventurous, go-getter mentality and aren’t afraid of failure.

They also understand the importance of enjoying the ride from the very beginning.

These people understand this is a process and find joy in more than getting that first AdSense check.

Know of anyone like this?  I do.  I got an e-mail from her a couple of weeks ago. Her name is Rachel and her site is GreenLeafeSimon.com.

I have her permission to post her e-mail on my blog, so I want to share it with you. Pay attention to the bold text. I did that for emphasis.

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Hello Lisa,

No need to answer this email; this is just to say thank you.

Awhile ago, my sister lost her job and I got the bright idea to help her learn how to make money online. She wasn’t interested and eventually got another job, but I got hooked!

I tried a few things and quickly learned most things on the net are scams. In the course of things however, I came across your website, 2Create A Website and I fell in love with the idea of having my own website. But about what? I love to write and all my life have wanted to be an author, so I got the idea to write serial stories and started a blog.

Then the idea grew and mushroomed as I found that although blogging was a lot of fun, the scope is limited. I took your sage advice and learned html and then css – and am I ever glad I did! I’ve never had so much fun in my life.

Designing, writing and marketing a website is better than any video game I’ve ever played (and I’ve played a lot of ‘em) and Lisa, I want to thank you for all the help, tips and advice you’ve provided for people like me.

From Colour Hex-code Generators to Server Side Includes (I actually cried when I finally made this work) and all the Tutorials and Videos in between, Thank you! I don’t think I could have done it without you. Many, many thanks!

Rachel
GreenLeafeSimon.com

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As a person who receives hundreds of e-mails per week with complaints and problems about either building a website or making money online, I really treasure e-mails like this.

Notice the bold phrases in the e-mail above.  See a pattern?  They all involve some kind of enjoyment or excitement.

Rachel reminds me of myself when I started 12 years ago.  I wasn’t making much money then, but there was something about the feeling of accomplishment and learning new things that was very exciting!  I always had that within me no matter how much I was earning.

I get asked about my “secret to success” all the time.  Some people think it’s my writing style.  Others believe it’s my videos.  I’ve also heard things like, She just chose the right niche, She had great timing, and my favorite…

She’s just lucky.

I actually think it’s a combination of several reasons, but one thing people neglect to mention is my sheer desire and passion for what I do.  In fact, I believe that is the #1 reason I have done so well.

This “Internet Marketing stuff” isn’t for everyone and you can’t make yourself love it just because you want to make money.   If you can’t find the joy, you may not be able to find the money.

So thank you, Rachel.  Your enthusiasm is refreshing and I have a feeling you will go far out here.

Remember folks, success starts with passion and the right attitude — not just the desire to make money.

You’ve had your blog for a few months now.  You’ve chosen a topic you love and have great information.  But you have very little traffic and no sales.

So what’s wrong?

Often times it’s nothing but your impatience and lack of consistency.

A few months is hardly enough time to give a new business.  So if you went into this with unrealistic expectations, you will be disappointed.

I get an amazing number of emails from people who claim “affiliate marketing doesn’t work.”  And when I ask them how long they’ve been at it, the answer is often two months or less.

Are you kidding me?

It took me months before any worthwhile money started to roll in. And even when my income didn’t equate to the hours I was spending online, I never stopped writing and strategizing.

If you haven’t generated a steady stream of traffic yet, one thing you have to work on is building momentum with consistency.

If you’re a new blogger, you need to establish a rhythm.  Posting once a month is probably not going to cut it.  This is a business so you must commit to it and take it seriously.

There are so many blogs and websites out there with great potential, but they’ve been abandoned by impatient owners looking for too much too soon.

I know it’s frustrating when you feel no one is reading your content.  But if you have a solid concept and believe in your site, you will be amazed at what will happen if you just stick with it and produce solid content on a consistent basis.

Set goals for content and video production. Make your presence known. It’s time for you to get serious. Let’s make 2010 a great one!

Sometimes failure can be your best your friend.

Take a trip with me down memory lane as I recall a few of my failed sites and the lessons learned.

If you’re viewing this post via e-mail or an RSS reader that doesn’t support video, watch the video here.

I recently posted a thread in my forum where I asked the members to give advice to people who are new to building websites and making money online.

I received a lot of insightful comments, and quickly noticed a common theme among the replies.

There was a lot of emphasis on planning and enjoyment — two things that are often ignored by people just starting out.

The Planning

I mention this a lot, but I’ll say it again.  People don’t just stumble upon websites or blogs like they do a store on a street (unless they’re using StumbleUpon.com.)

So while you may have a great idea for something, you have to consider how people will find you.  And not just any people, but people who will be interested and/or need what you have to offer.

One of the most common reasons people fail is they don’t put a lot of research into their ideas.  Coming up with a great idea is an obvious first step, but execution is the most important one.

You really have to educate yourself on how people use/surf the web and what techniques are available to draw traffic to your site.  A lot of people believe their great idea is enough to funnel traffic to their site, but it doesn’t work that way.

Enjoyment

Where would I be if I didn’t love what I do?

Well for starters, I’d probably still be at my 9 to 5 job.

The love for this business is what kept me going all these years.  I haven’t always had high-trafficked websites, and my affiliate checks used to have fewer numbers on the left side of the decimal.

I spent many frustrating days and nights scratching my head over code, or trying to figure out how to FTP the right PHP so my URL wouldn’t be 403.  (Yes, it rhymes.)

But in the end, I’ve always found this process rewarding.  There’s nothing like that sense of accomplishment when I learn something new, plus it keeps me wanting to learn more.  My love for writing and teaching others has also made the ride fun.

So that’s the attitude you have to have about this or you are doomed to fail.  Enjoyment comes first and then the money.  Not the other way around.  You have to find something about this process that will keep you motivated through the challenging times.

A lady once told me “If my site would just make some money, I would probably enjoy this more.”  But the real trick is you have to enjoy it enough to stick around long enough for your site to make money.

And let me be honest. Some of you must come to the harsh realization that this may not be for you.  The desire to make a lot of money and be successful is a start, but the enjoyment is what keeps you going when the going gets tough.  People who make a lot of money whether it be online or off, typically enjoy what they do.

Are there days when I feel totally uninspired and uncreative? Absolutely. But those moments don’t usually last long and are often due to external situations not related to this business. So you may have to ask yourself. Am I really enjoying this or am I enjoying the idea of financial independence and financial security more?

I’ll let you ponder that one for a minute.

If you remember nothing about what it takes to succeed online remember two things: planning and enjoyment. These two alone will take you very far out here.

And planning should go beyond “I want to make money and I want my site to have X, Y and Z.”  In fact, that’s not planning.  It’s a goal.

Research your market.  Find out what people in your niche need and want.  What kind of problems can you help them solve? Look for forums in your potential niche and keep an eye out for recurring topics.  Check out existing websites and blogs and look for gaps and areas of opportunity.  Hone your writing skills and study up on the various ways to market your website.

Don’t forget to read the forum thread.  There’s some great advice from people who have been there/done that.

Feel free to add your own advice and lessons.  And if you’re a newbie, absorb the information like a sponge!  You are fortunate to get this kind of advice that a lot of us didn’t have when we started.

I was doing some website clean-up this morning and came across an oldie but goody — a PDF published some years ago by Ken Evoy titled “Why People Fail.”

In this book, Ken outlines 13 different mentalities/personalities that cause failure.

Even though this book was written years ago, it contains eye-opening, in-your-face points that are still very relevant today.

From the Ready-Aim-Ready-Aim mentality (the person who plans, researches, plans, researches, and never starts) to the Fire-Fire-Fire-Fire-Fire-Fire mentality (the person who jumps from one idea to another and has trouble sticking with one concept because they lose patience if the money doesn’t roll in fast enough).

Ken does a great job of categorizing the various personalities.   In one section he carefully describes one group as “IQ challenged”.

Don’t frown. That may sound insulting, but it was written quite tastefully. He bluntly points out that this business is not for everyone, just like any other line of work.

Unfortunately many people have trouble facing this fact. They believe that wanting to make money should be enough motivation to succeed, but it takes more than that.

Adding My Two Cents

If I were to add a 14th mentality to Ken’s list, it would be “Fear of Failure.”  So many people never make it over the hump because they are afraid to fail.

I cannot tell you how many emails I’ve received from people who are hesitant to start a blog or a website because they worry no one will ever visit… as if it’s some kind of personal rejection.

Let me tell you.  I’ve had more failed sites than profitable ones.  And if it weren’t for those failures, I wouldn’t be earning a living online today.

It’s not about how long it takes you to succeed. It’s about acknowledging the mistakes you make and using those lessons to catapult yourself to the next level.  And if that means trying 3 or 4 different concepts before finding the right one, so be it.

People forget that success is largely mental. If you go through this process plagued with fear of failure, it can stifle your creativity and prevent you from sticking with it when progress is slow.

That’s why so many people get too caught up in the Ready-Aim, Ready-Aim, Ready-Aim mentality Ken mentioned.  They are afraid to step out of their safety net and just do it (as the old Nike campaign instructed.)

So if you haven’t read Ken’s mini book, give it a read (right-click, and “save as” to download).  It’s free.

If you’re having trouble getting your site or blog off the ground, you may see yourself in this book. That’s not necessarily a bad thing.  It could be the reality check you need.

I call it the “Hodgepodge Theory.” And if this applies to your site, it may be a big reason why you aren’t seeing your AdSense earnings increase.

Watch the video below to learn more about why I believe many people struggle with building their AdSense revenue…